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Confidence is sexy. There’s no doubt about it. You can be a confident person outside of the bedroom, but once sex is in the mix, confidence gets thrown out the window. The truth is many women begin to find their sexual confidence in their 30s. Men, on the other hand, are the most confident in bed beginning at age 50. And, 1 in 10 women is self-conscious in the bedroom, according to an online survey.
Building your sexual confidence is all about forgetting what society wants us to think about sex. You know what I’m talking about: only the young are sexually attractive, men and women lose their ability to perform sexually after a certain age, sex gets boring as you age.
Once you move to pass those pre-conceptions society has placed on sex, it’s time to start building your sexual confidence, one GR8 tip at a time.
Start with Your Self-Confidence
A recent survey in the UK concluded that 10 percent of women never feel confident about their bodies during sex, compared to 3 percent of men. Whether you accept it or not, sex is a physical activity, and the way you feel about your body has a lot to do with your ability to perform.
While working on your self-confidence is easier said than done, you have to make an effort. Try this: every day, take a long look at yourself naked. At first, you’re not going to be in love with what you see. But, the more you look, the more often you’ll start finding things that you like. Slowly but surely, your self-confidence outside the bedroom will trickle down to the bed.
Communicate with Your Partner Openly
How is your sexual wellness? Having an open, strong, and transparent communication with your partner will be key to finding your confidence in the bedroom. You should never be afraid to voice what you enjoy. If you fear judgment from your sexual partner, perhaps you should reconsider your relationship.
Next time you’re in an intimate moment, voice your desires. Listen to your partner’s suggestions and recommendations. BUT, don’t ever feel pressured to do something you’re not comfortable with. Having a respectful sexual connection is vital.
Get to Know Yourself – Sexually
Are you able to answer your partner when they ask what excites you? Can you easily list three sexual positions? When was the last time you masturbated? Being sexually confident is about knowing yourself first, and then finding that connection with your partner.
Use your imagination to discover what turns you on. Experiment with different techniques and toys until you find what feels right for you.
Practice Soft Sex
For some men, there’s nothing scarier than not having an erection during the act. For women, there’s nothing worse than having a wandering mind during the act. Both need to relax. Erections are important for intercourse. However, there are so many pleasurable ways to have sex while a man is soft. Many sexual activities don’t require an erection.
To slowly build sexual confidence, practice soft sex with your partner that doesn’t lead to intercourse. This may include kissing, touching, masturbating, or even watching. When neither of you is focused on intercourse, the pressure to perform at your best is off, which lets you both lower your guards and enjoy being present in the moment.
Find Your Sexual Confidence Routine
Just like you have a self-care routine you do every night, you need to find your sexual confidence routine. Through exploration, you can see what excites you and your partner more quickly and confidently. By combining all the tips I’ve mentioned before, you can find the routine and habits that will get you in the mood so you can safely enhance the sexual experience for both of you.
A Note from GR8NESS
Remember, building your sexual confidence won’t happen overnight, and it’s a very personal journey. If you feel that your sexual life is struggling due to your lack of confidence, consider speaking with a sex therapist about your worries and obstacles. Be caring and patient with yourself, and ask your partner to do the same. Slowly but surely, you’ll find your sexual confidence.
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