We have all experienced it or have done it. Have you ever wondered where your friend went all of a sudden? It seems as though they have spontaneously combusted into thin air, leaving no trace left behind. Ghosting is a term used to describe a person randomly disappearing and becoming non-communicative for a duration of time.
Social ghosting can occur for days, weeks, months, and even years. Usually, those who get ghosted have a lot of questions as to why the other party went away. Our minds try to fill in the blanks as to where they went, why they left, and when they will come back. Our minds tend to jump from one assumption to the next, trying to find a rational reason for the unexpected end of communication. Our desire to fill in the blanks can drive us crazy the longer we wait for a response.
Perhaps they had to tend to a family emergency. Maybe your friend just got caught up with work, school, or their children. The actual reason for their absence may be unknown for a while. However, a lot of people who become ghosted eventually think that they are the cause and wonder if there may be something wrong with them.
Resentment and bad feelings towards that friend can start to build the longer a person feels abandoned. No one likes to feel unwanted and that is a common feeling among those who have dealt with ghosting. These feelings may be indications that there are deeper roots to some unchecked insecurities you may have.
Take Advantage of the Time
If you become ghosted, take it as a moment to work on yourself whether you were the cause or not. We all have room for improvements to be made. So, spend some time with yourself. Is it the unknown that is uncomfortable or is it the silence? Either way, you can learn how to enjoy being by yourself and enjoying your own company.
If you get invited to go out to the movies and the other party does not show up, go anyways. You can still have an enjoyable time by yourself. We can learn so much about ourselves when we are alone. For example, perhaps there’s been a creative endeavor that you can start working on. You will likely discover skills, talents, hobbies, and new interests as you take time for yourself.
You Don’t Have to Wait for Anyone
Don’t assume that you are not good enough for someone to want communication with you. They may be dealing with issues of their own and need their own space. Focusing on yourself will give you a greater sense of empathy and compassion for others as you make allowances for these absences.
Clear your mind of the blame you might be placing on yourself and welcome in acceptance. Some people simply leave due to an over-stimulation of socialization. Take breaks for yourself to hang out with family or some other people in your life.